Realizing, at 2:00 a.m., that you can freakin’ hear your neighbor snoring, from the next apartment over.

Dude, nasal surgery. Invest.

“Always remember: No matter how wonderful you think he is, some woman, somewhere, is sick of him.”

– source unfortunately forgotten

I don’t know if this is popular outside of L.A. or not, but there’s this phenomenon that’s been popping up on the backs of certain people’s cars.

The size of the text of the message ranges anywhere from bumper-sticker-sized to covering the whole back windshield, but in all caps block print, will be the BLARING message:

JESUS IS GOD
READ THE BIBLE

(::eye roll:: There’s so much to say about that that I can’t say anything about that.)

I prefer my own message. Look for it soon on a bumper near you:

EVERYONE IS GOD
READ THE FUNNIES